At the End of the Big Sleep

Yeah, I know. It's been a long time since I've had anything to say. So, here's a recap:

The A's did really bad, then they did really good, now they're doing sort of good, and with a little faith they just might hold on to win a spot in the Wildcard game.

The Giants have done good, pretty much the whole time. They're in. Buster Posey is good. Pablo Sandoval is fat. Timmy kind of knows what is going on and definitely misses his bong. Melky is a bad man, but so is Bartolo.

The Angels and Dodgers are underperforming. It makes everyone happy. By everyone I mean me and Frankie, and decidedly not Jon.

The football replacement referees were terrible. The NFL should probably be ashamed for the way they handled the situation, just like Bud Selig should be ashamed of everything he has ever done ever or will ever do.

Oh yeah, the Olympics happened, and just like every four years, everyone in the US gets excited about gymnastics, swimming, and dressage, and then promptly forgets that they exist. So that's fun for everybody too.

So yes, it has been a big sleep for Misters Frankie and Eric. We're busy men. So sue us. But I awaken, like the immortal kraken. And not that lame kraken in Pirates of the Caribbean, we're talking Clash of the Titans starring Harry Hamlin kraken.

Seriously, how hot is Harry Hamlin? And Bubo?

Yeah, you'll have to look up the kraken on your own. I, like I assume most of you are, am most interested in Harry Hamlin's right nipple.

But that's not the point here. The point here is that yours truly was the victim of a random act of violence yesterday evening, and it got me to thinking. And I know what you're thinking. Thinking is something I should do all the time. Well, it isn't.

Anyway, sports are pretty freaking amazing. After all the turmoil I went through last night, I was able to completely lose my self for a few hours this morning in meaningful Oakland Athletic September baseball. They lost, but still, it was a welcome distraction. The fact that we can all be consumed by sports, and that every day we can talk about them over the water cooler is something that levels the playing field each day.

Get excited about the A's and Giants. They're both going to the playoffs. But the A's need your help. They've got six at home this weekend and next week. They've got three against Seattle, then three against Texas. Go to the games. Send them good vibes. They can do this. We have to believe.

Finally, here's what I would like to say to the two nice gentlemen who decided to bump into me last night. Warning, NSFW.

Frankie and Eric's Adventure, Vol 4.

Written on a bus from Boston to New York at 10AM, on 6 hours of sleep. Note the coherence.

Vol 4.

It's been quite some time since I had a moment to chronicle all that has occurred on this trip. Nay, trip is not the correct word. It's an odyssey. Maybe a journey. I'm getting reminiscient already and we're still on it. I'm currenty on the bus to New York to visit the great Dagle.

I wish I could adequately remember everything that has happened. Ann Arbor was a hell of a town. We were only there less than 24 hours, but they were 24 great ones. We got to see the Big House, we got to see the Law Quad, we even got to take a nap on the Diag. We got fantastic Cuban food that I am going to steal the recipe for an open a restaurant in Berkeley or San Francisco and make a killing. I have to extend the greatest thanks to our host, the great Anna W. She was out of this world with her generosity, and made Ann Arbor a special place, even if the drivers think that killing pedestrians is a sport.

Also, I have coined a new phrase. You've heard it here first. When your legs are tired, it is common to say that your dogs are barking, correct? So, Frankie and my legs were totally spent in Ann Arbor, and I believe it was Frankie to declared that he was beating his dogs. To this, I replied that he was definitely Michael Vicking it. Boom. Michael Vicking. Now a verb. Too soon? I don't think so. But then again, as Frankie has reminded me numerous times, my censor could probably use an upgrade.

We then drove to Pittsburgh. The ride was fairly uneventful, though I would not reccomend eating at Hardee's. Actually, I would not recommend ever being in Ohio. For any reason. It was pretty much, the worst. It made me feel prettttty, pretty good about myself. For those of you who like Ohio, I'm sorry. But I'm pretty glad we didn't stay there long. We then got to stay with Frankie's Aunt and Uncle in the 'burbs of the 'Burgh.

Frankie's family were all great. When my extended family gets together, we spend most of the conversation making fun of each other. It's all in good fun. But when Frankie's family parties, they're all genuinely nice to each other. It was alien. But it was really fun. It was also freaking hot in Pittsburgh. Outside was not much of an option.

Saturday was our day to truly explore the city. After dropping off the car at the airport, we headed "dahntahn" on the bus. Our first stop was the Western Pennsylvania History Museum. It has five floors, two of which are devoted to sports, and another half floor is devoted to ketchup. There were also dinosaurs dressed patriotically. That was pretty sweet.

The sports section of the museum actually was really cool. There was a lot of memorabilia courtesy of the Pirates and Steelers. There was also a great section devoted to Negro League Baseball. Pittsburgh had the Crawfords and the Grays, two of the best teams in the game. The best part of the exhibit also is the quote of the post. The museum had set up a place for people to write down their comments and memories regarding the Pirates. A school group of third graders had been through recently, and filled many pages with their thoughts. The best one was, "The Pirates aren't very good." Frankie and I laughed for hours.

We walked around Pittsburgh for a few more hours; taking in the sights, eating monster fish sandwiches, drinking Iron City beers, and playing catch at Fort Pitt. Frankie made a fantastic diving catch and skinned up his leg. But it was worth it. But it would prove to plague him for the rest of the trip.

We then made it to PNC Park. And there's no two ways about it, it's an absolute gem. Sitting on the north bank of the Allegheny River, Pittsburgh has built a monument of a park well worthy of the history of the city of Pittsburgh. The outfield opens right up for a view of the bridges and the city. The confines are cozy, even sitting in the outfield I felt like I had a good view of the game. They had interesting architecture and it was a generally pleasant experience. The 21 foot right field wall in homage to "The Great One", Roberto Clemente, was a nice touch to make it a little more difficult for lefties to take advantage of the short porch. The fireworks after the game over the water with the city in the background were exquisite. Even the game was good, a 3-2 Pirates victory on a walk-off hit batter sent everyone home happy.

Yes, Pittsburgh was a fair and just mistress, but after many games of ladder golf, we were on our way to Boston, the real gem of the trip.

Frankie and Eric's Adventure, Vol. 3

Written on Day 4 of the trip, on a train from Chicago to Ann Arbor at 7:30 AM, on about 4 hours of sleep.

Vol 3.

Just like Milwaukee before it, Chicago has fallen to the greatness that is Frankie and Eric. In 24 short hours, we conquered the Second City in a way only we know how. One day is never actually enough to see a city, but damned if we didn't try. Though I could never stop thinking I was in either Blues Bros. or Ferris Bueller, I was able to stay in the moment long enough to see a great amount of treasures that Chicago has to offer. We saw the giant steel bean, the top of the world at Willis Tower, ate a GINORMOUS pizza, and generally saw the sights of Chicago. We also managed to check out the Billy Goat Tavern and have a beer with Mich. It was super duper.

But, like most of the other destinations, our real purpose is baseball, and Chicago was no different. We saw not one, but two fantastic houses of worship. In the afternoon, we took an "L" to the northside to Wrigleyville in what quickly became a religious experience. It's a very cool old ballpark and lived up to the hype. The tour we got to take because the Cubs are on the road was both informative and exciting. I drank out of the same water fountain that Willie Mays once did. Boom. We got to see both clubhouses and both dugouts, as well as the press box and the scoreboard. It's unreal to think about all the games played in that park.

Wrigley Field is pretty amazing to behold. walking up to it, it's like you stumble upon a sandlot in the middle of a suburban setting, but it happens to be a 40,000 seat sandlot. It's definitely a park. With the ivy on the outfield wall and the old timey scoreboard that isn't even large enough to show all the games being played in a given day and real bleachers in the outfield, it's like you're quickly transported to an earlier era. It's absolutely worth a visit.

After grabbing a quick pint and reminding ourselves why Harry Caray is one of the greatest people ever, we hopped back on the "L" and made it down to the Southside where an actual ballgame was about to be played. I use "actual ballgame" in the loosest sense because it was between the White Sox and Twins, and Jamey Carroll is hilariously bad. The Twins looked like a AA club out there as Chris Sale (note: since this was written Sale has had two more great starts, we may have witnessed the beginning of a great career) and the White Sox blanked them 6-0.

US Cellular field is an interesting park, though Miller and Wrigley beat it handily in almost every respect. It was very tall and there was no view to the outside world, kind of like Oakland. The concourse was a bit dreary. It felt like a "stadium", not like a park like many of the other new fields. However, it didn't quite have all the modern kinks worked out that would excuse it in any way. The three scoreboards in left, center, and right all displayed different information, so you kept having to swivel your head in order to see everything. The out of town scoreboard was insanely busy and hard to read. Also, their mascot is a travesty.

 

No one truly knows what South Paw is or where he came from, but he definitely gave us nightmares. There are also lightup pinwheels in center. They're the same ones that were on the board at old Comiskey Park, so that was pretty cool. Also, in a very odd feature it took Frankie and I way too long to figure out, two dirt fungo circles are etched into the field on either side of home plate. They mark where the coach should stand in order to hit infield practice during the pregame warm ups, but they don't seem quite necessary in today's day and age. With all that said, it was a very fun game and the Chicagoans (Chicagites? Chicagans?) were very nice to us and or silly curiosities.

Today we are headed to the major non-baseball stop of the trip to detox a little and probably play catch, Ann Arbor, Michigan. The saga continues....

Quote of the Day: I'm in the middle of Chicago and I don't have reception. %$&# you AT&T.

Frankie and Eric's Adventure, Volume 2

Written on day 3 of the trip, on a train going from Milwaukee to Chicago at 8 am, on about 3 hours of sleep.

We've conquered Milwaukee. Conquered may be used in the loosest definition of the term. But, we did make it out of there alive. Miller Park is a gorgeous facility. Their bratwurst are absolutely delicious. Especially with kraut. As the first park on our journey, it definitely lived up to all it's deserved billing. It was the first time I've seen a game indoors, and I have to say the experience was very pleasant. Almost too pleasant. But, we did get to see a Giants victory and a pretty amazing sausage race, so Milwaukee get's my seal of approval.

Miller Park is built on the spot of the old stadium, so not very close to downtown. But, Milwaukee is small enough that getting there is not too hard. The field itself is pretty. The scoreboard very legible, the sight lines fantastic, and there are some pretty sweet concessions and features, like a giant slide As I sit here on the train to Chicago Frankie keeps yelling at me for making fun of the accents of the people around me. They have the greatest accents ever. Like hardcore. I don't know if that describes them accurately. It does for me. You all will just have to imagine it. The woman behind me just said "handicapped parking", and I couldn't contain myself. I'm a terrible person.

Things learned in Milwaukee:

1. Be careful saying the word "kite".
2. Underground Pakistani food is always a good decision.
3. Women from Wiwona, Minnesota are bad news. Never trust them. They are awful people. Awful. I cannot stress this enough. Seriously. I hate them. I hate them so much. Even if they're Giants fans. They're the worst women on the planet.
4. The music being played from the Milwaukee Art Museum at noon was perhaps the greatest thing I've ever heard. I wish I could adequately put this into writing. It was like the chimes of Big Ben, except more Van Haleny. They lasted for about 45 seconds. It was unreal. So Frank and I are standing at the Veterans Memorial (side note: Milwaukeeans love their veterans/POWs. I haven't seen more memorials/monuments to soldiers anywhere else except DC. This is not a bad thing, just an observation.) But yes, we're standing at the memorial building on Lake Michigan at noon, and suddenly the most epic music ever begins to play. This is the only way to describe it. Think Fantasmic meets Panama meets Call of Duty theme meets Revelations meets Like A G-Men meets Star Wars. (The woman behind me just said "copy" and "office". Again, I couldn't contain myself.) Boom. You now know how my conciousness works. But yes, Frankie an I never did find out who chose to play this music and why they chose to play it. We just know that whoever it was made the best decision we've ever been privy to. We want to shake his hand and be more like him.
5. Miller Brewery is very, very cool. They make a lot of beer. It is all delicious.

So, all that said, this is still a sports blog.... The A's are the absolute worst, and I say that with all the love my heart has to give. It's a ton. They need to stay on the field. I can't stress enough how happy this early season success has made me, but if they can't stay on the field, it's going to be short lived, and that will make me most unhappy. Inge needs to get healthy. Cespedes needs to get healthy. McCarthy needs to get healthy. ManRam needs to stop juicing. It's going to be a long summer unless a few things start going Oakland's way.

As for the Giants, they have hope. Brandon Crawford looks like a decent hitter in the two hole. Hector Sanchez hit that home run Monday night, and his bat being productive would be huge. Angel Pagan, while not the most approachable player (Frankie and I saw him coming out of the team hotel, totally randomly, and he did not want to give us the time of day), is swinging a hot bat. The point is, with the Dodgers' injury woes, there's no reason to believe that this team won't be competing for something meaningful come September. If I had internet access right now, I'd quote you some stats and notes, but I can't, because Amtrak hates me. Tonight Frankie and I get to see the great Chris Sale of the Chicago White Sox take on the great Scott Diamond of the Minnesota Twins. It should be a matchup for the ages. HAR. Let's Go Oakland!

Quote of the Day: Frank, go to bed.

Frankie and Eric's Adventure Vol 1.

I wrote this in the Denver Airport on day one of the trip, and it needed to be shared.

It was bound to happen. Eric and Frankie were going to spend so much time together that they were to become one entity. One being. One existance. Like a married couple. It's legal in New York, people. We're going there. Think of the fireworks. Think of the oil. Not the crude oil. The baby oil.

Frankie and I, for those of you who do not talk to us on a daily basis, are on a whirlwind tour around the midwest and east coast to watch some baseball, which is, of course, all that we love and care about. Except for K-Dawg. Frankie looooooooooooooves K-Dawg. It's why he won't let me touch him. It's very upsetting.

We have been sitting, on day one, in the Denver airport, for the last 6 hours. We have had many pints of beer. The point is, we're very excited to be going on this trip. We're going to see baseball in so many different locations, that we are going to have it bleeding out of eyeballs. K-Dawg, please do not read the next sentence. Also, we might have some awkward man on man moments.

But, in case you were wondering, and forgot from the previous paragraph. we've been drinking in Denver for the past six hours. We've met a lot of new friends, including Billy Bob, Mary Rae, Kimberly, Jenna Lee, and Beau. We even had our own names of Jimmy Joe and Jim Bob. Yeah, things have been going great.

 The point here is that we're ready to give you, our loyal fans, a play by play rundown of our epic trip through the frigid/swampy nothingness that is the north, and we want you along every step of the way. So, go Giants, go A's, and here's to the journey. Get ready for some posts.

P.S. The A's rule and the Giants drool. Get ready for the three game series in Oakland, we will return the favor.

P.P.S. I just went to Dodger Stadium and it was fantastic, the company was even better.

P.P.P.S. This is Frankie. The Giants are the greatest team ever. We will destroy all opposition and confiscate your divers licenses.

P.P.P.P.S. The opinions of Frankie are not those necessarily expressed by We're In This Thing, Inc. We just did a shot of Maker's Mark. He's confused.

Rumblings, Grumblings, Musings, and Ruminations

So yeah.... Hello everyone. It's been awhile since I've written anything, and for that I am truly sorry. I know alllllll 15-25 of you who give this blog a gander have been sorely disappointed by my lack of hard-hitting, informative, in-your-face blogging. I hope you all can forgive me. I have lost the muse.

Hopefully I've found it again.

So, what's been going on?

Probably a lot of this

Reaction to the A's Victory Yesterday

At First I was like:



Then I was like:


That is all.

One Week In: What We Learned

After falling to 2-4 after 6 games, what really can we learn?

It's not a great amount. The A's aren't very good. We knew that. We knew that they weren't going to be the team to beat in the West. Hell, we knew that they weren't going to be a team that mattered in the West. So what have the first six games taught us, if anything?

One of my greatest friends gave me a 1988 Pennant today. I got shivers. I read the names of Dave Stewart, Terry Steinbach, Luis Polonia, Dave Parker, Rick Honeycutt, Gene Nelson, Storm Davis, Tony Phillips, Don Baylor, Greg Cadaret, Carney Lansford, Walt Weiss, Mark McGwire, Jose Canseco....

They were a brilliant team. But they weren't anything without the support around them. I appeal to you, Oakland. Be proud of this team. Be proud of what we've had. And be damned if ownership and politics take them away from us.

MLB Preview - The Oakland Athletics

We've finally made it to the team picked first overall in the 2012 WITT draft, the Oakland A's. How did a team picked by many to be so bad this year make it to the top spot? They are undeniably my favorite, that's how. They're the greatest team no one cares about or watches. They've got spark. They've got spirit. They've got spunk. They've got a terrible stadium and terrible ownership and terrible cash flow. However, through it all, they still remain the A's, and there's something special about this ball club.

Maybe it's because the A's are like this man:



You can't really get angry at Modern Family's Phil Dunphy. He's an underdog. He's not always the smartest. He's not always the fastest. His ideas can be a bit harebrained. But, through it all, he charms you and warms you down to the cockles of your heart. That's what the A's are going to do this season. Why? Because it's really the only thing they have.

The A's have entered pretty well worn territory this year. Really put together a team that could be considered trite and contrived. However, when you put a ragtag bunch of misfits on the field, it's sure to draw a little attention. You know, away from all the stuff about how the A's are in a land war with the Giants and Uncle Bud isn't actually doing anything about it. And how they can't draw more than 12 people to a game. Yeah. We're doing something about that... in 2014.

#3 - The Texas Rangers

Everyone loves a bridesmaid. Right? That's how the saying goes. I think. I don't really have a mind for sayings, nor do I really want one. But, the Texas Rangers have been the Maid of Honor for the last two seasons. They've been the Quagmire to the Peter, the Sundance to the Butch Cassidy, the Tonto to the Lone Ranger, the silly, bumbling Frankie, to the dashing, heart throb Eric. God that Eric is one hot tamale. But enough about Eric and his startlingly good looks and charm, it's time to pay attention to that other also ran, the Rangers.

The Rangers have been the 2012 University of Kentucky Wildcats over the last two years. They've been a seeming juggernaut for the past two years, and won the past two AL pennants, which were their first two in the history of their franchise. Unfortunately, they fell short both times, once to the upstart San Francisco Giants, and once to the upstart St. Louis Cardinals. That's right, those damn foreign cities, like that damn Katniss from that upstart district 12, have gotten the best of the Capitol that represents the Texas Rangers.

First of all, I saw Hunger Games with Frankie. Second, my analogy makes way more sense and he should have not used it because the Pirates are terrible. And third, there's no way in hell the Pirates should be ranked ahead of the A's in power rankings on ESPN. But the biggest point here, is that the Rangers are still really, really good. The odds are definitely in their favor. That's right. The Rangers, the team that was borderline hilarious for most of their history until the last three years, has become something of an equivalent to the evilness that is the Yankees.

#5 - The Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim

We've made it to the top 5. For those of you who've stuck with us this far and read every preview, we appreciate you. For those of you reading your first preview, we appreciate you. You might say that we're full of appreciation. And if there's one team this year that deserves a bit of your appreciation, it's the Los Angeles Angels.

The Angels did exactly the opposite of the A's this season and spent a ton of money. How much money, you ask? They gave Albert Pujols $240 Million. They gave CJ Wilson 77.5 Millon. They still owe Vernon Wells about 60 Million. They gave Jered Weaver 85 Million. They owe Torii Hunter 18 Million, and Bobby Abreu 9 Million. Did you get all that? Their payroll of about 138 million this year ranks fourth in the majors. It is double what the A's pay their roster.

Needless to say, I now think Arte Moreno looks like this:

#7 - The Detroit Tigers

So just when I thought I could play some video games and then take a nice nap before waking up at 2:50 to attempt to watch opening day. That's right, the 2012 baseball season starts today. Though if you were to look at MLB.com, you would barely know. That's right, I have some hate for Bud Selig right now, but I'll do my best to leave that out, and focus on the Detroit Tigers

The Tigers have quietly become one of my favorite teams outside of the A's as of late, and I hope to explain to myself why as I write this preview. Though I really didn't appreciate seeing the Magglio walkoff against my A's in the 2006 ALCS played over and over last year, the Tigers have a lot of pieces to like.

I wrote last year how Detroit had become something of a depressed sports city, but that turned around last year. The Tigers reached the ALCS, and even the lowly Lions made the playoffs. That's right, like Clint Eastwood says, it's the Fourth Quarter America, and it's time for the Tigers to shine.



Yeah, his logic isn't that good, but I never claimed to be very bright either. And when a man wear's his pants that high, you know he must be right.

#9 - Tampa Bay Rays

That's right, the team that went first in our draft out of the AL East was not the Red Sox, nor was it the Yankees. It was the Tampa Bay Rays, who, over the past few years, have played the most exciting baseball that no one ever watches. Really, last year they averaged on 18,878 fans per game. That number is good for 29th in the league, only better than the Oakland A's. The difference is that with a record of 91-71, that means the Rays averaged 207 fans per win on their average attendance. The A's earned 246 fans for each of their 74 wins.

So why don't Floridans embrace this franchise that has been in the playoffs 3 of the past four years? Why don't they show up by the boatload to see this team that has won 2 AL East crowns and an AL Pennant in the last four years? The world may never know.

But one can still make conjectures. Their park, the Trop, is an eyesore. The Tampa Bay area has only been a baseball city since 1998, and until about 2007, the team was the butt of every joke in major league baseball. Until 2008, they had only won 70 games once in their history. I think these fans either can't believe, or are just largely unaware that this team exists. After suffering through about a decade of ineptitude, the Rays have become one of the top teams in the league. They've developed a bevy of young talent and succeeded with it. Last year was admittedly a "rebuilding" year, but with all the talent, they made winning 91 look easy. Still, no one came to the park, and I know why. Steve Irwin.

#11 - The New York Yankees

That's right, the Yankees didn't crack the top ten. In case you don't remember from last year's post or you've never talked to me about baseball. I hate the Yankees. I hate them because they are a Goliath in the sports world whose level of success can't be compared to any other professional American franchise. To reiterate, the Yankees have won the AL Pennant 40 times in 109 tries. It's obscene. It's enough to drive any sports fan in any other city nuts. And in at least one case, I know it to be very, very true.

The Yankees are the kings of the majors. If you ask anyone in America to name a baseball team, chances are that they know the Yankees, even if they can't name the team in their own backyard. Yes, I know that my extreme dislike of the Yankees is based in envy. I want my team to have that level of success year in and year out that makes me believe we're failed if we didn't win the World Series. I want to know that my ownership is willing to spend obscene amounts of money to get players they have no business signing. I want my roster to have players that all have contact and power ratings of 85 instead of 65 in video games. It makes them so much easier to play.

But most of all, I hate Derek Jeter. I hate his smug smile. I hate his five World Championship rings. I hate the fact that he's going to be a first ballot hall of famer. I hate that he represents everything Yankee. I especially dislike the fact that he is a truly good human being who plays the game well and shows up every day with a smile. God I'm jealous of him too. Although, I am not jealous of his taco shop. It sounds terrible.

#13 - The Boston Red Sox

The Boston Red Sox, like the Braves, narrowly missed the playoffs last year after blowing a seemingly unblowable lead. The Red Sox were 83-53 om September first. They were first in the AL East by a half game, and they were 9 games ahead of the Rays. Not only that, but they had 7 games to play against the Rays. Surely, they would be able to at least split that series, leaving the Rays far behind. But it wasn't to be. The Red Sox went 1-6 over those two series in September. For the month, they went 7-17. A quick images search for "boston choke" reveals this, and I find it quite appropriate.



Yes, like the great James Tiberius Kirk chokes when he doesn't have oxygen to breathe, the Red Sox choked when their team couldn't stay on the field, and was happier to sit in the clubhouse drinking beers during the game. Reports came out that Manager Terry Francona no longer had control of his team. It also didn't help that 10 different pitchers made starts for the Red Sox over the course of the season. 11 different players took a turn starting the game in the outfield. All this turnover and uncertainty, as well as drunkenness resulted in something we all know too well:

#15 - The Atlanta Braves

According to an Adult Swim bump, Atlanta is the worst sports city in the nation. They've taken home one championship in 153 combined years of professional sports. You might call them just the worst. That's right, Atlanta is worse than Cleveland, which actually only ranked 8th, but fittingly, the Braves beat the Indians for the only Atlanta championship. What I'm trying to say here is, it's not always that much fun to be a Braves fan, unless of course you want to talk smack on the Pirates.

Frankie posted this little bitty video last year, but I always enjoy taking the opportunity to remind him of the last time the Pirates were good and how they let it slip through their fingers and turned it into one of the greatest moments in Braves franchise history.



Of course, without the help of the Braves and one Mr. Brooks Conrad, the Giants would not have been able to experience one of the greatest moments in their franchise history. So, I guess the Braves have a love hate relationship with all those Pirates/Giants fans in the world. Since there are all of maybe one of those in the country, at least he can be conflicted.

#17 - The Chicago White Sox

The last time I spoke to you, it was about the nice north side of Chicago, we now turn our attention to the South Side, where the real Chicago is. There was a lot of doom and gloom in that post. Surely Chicago can't have two teams that will struggle all summer. The ChiSox have to have a bit more going for them, right?

Well.... not really. I'm telling you right now... there are a lot of red flags that say it's going to be a long summer in the Windy City. The White Sox finished 2011 at 79-83, nine games worse than 2010, and I don't believe they added enough pieces in the offseason to be a contender in what will be a very weak AL Central in 2012. This is mostly because they actually didn't add any pieces. Even at the time I'm writing this, the White Sox are 2-7 in Cactus league play, and we described in an MLB.com article yesterday as "hapless". This franchise might be in trouble.


At least Ozzie is gone, maybe now the kittens will be spared.

The biggest move Chicago made this offseason was letting Ozzie Guillen go to the fish and letting Robin Ventura become their new manager. Guillen was fiery and fun and gave the media plenty to talk about, but was about as stable as this:

#19 - The Chicago Cubs

I'm sorry Cubs fans, I'm distracted this evening. It didn't help that when I looked at the roster, the best word to describe my feeling was "unimpressed". Look, I think of the Cubs as a very proud franchise. I think of Ernie Banks. I think of Johnny Evers. I think of Ryne Sandberg. I'm not sure I yet think of Geovany Soto as an heir to Mr. Cub, and I don't see this team getting past the regular season.

This year will be a facelift for Chicago. They've hired new general manager Theo Epstein. If the man can break the Curse of the Bambino like he did in Boston, he's probably the person best suited to breaking the Billy Goat Curse in Chicago. This year, however, we may see some growing pains.

It's too bad for Chicago. They've got so many good things going for them. Ferris Bueller, The Blues Brothers, Second City Comedy, Lake Michigan, The El Train, That Cloud Thing, Mayor Daly.... the list goes on... but it's all what was, or what is, and they're not things that will influence the 2012 Cubs.

So what will? Will it be this?



Or this?



Bonus points if you can tell one from the other. (Hint: they are actually the same)

#21 - The Toronto Blue Jays

We finish out our first third of the 2012 MLB landscape today with the preview of the Jays. It's been 20 years since we heard, "Touch 'em all Joe, you'll never hit a bigger home run in your life." But it could happen again. Hailing from the frozen north, the Blue Jays have the privilege of being that other bird team in the division totally dominated by the Yankees and Red Sox, and then in recent years, the Rays. This means, just like their sick Canadian heritage suggests, they're totally liable to launch a sneak attack on happy, unsuspecting, innocent Americans. It will be just like in the brilliant hypothetical film, South Park: The Movie. Remember, they bombed the Baldwins. And look how ridiculous their royal weddings are:

Royal Pudding
Get More: SOUTH
PARKIke Broflovski,Terrance,Phillip,more...

And lest we forget Bryan Adams..... never forget Bryan Adams..... and the horror he has brought upon the world.

Bryan Adams At His Worst

Yes, Canada has been the scourge of America since the Americans failed to defeat them in the War of 1812. Unfortunately, we've had to coexist peacefully. We've even had to share our sport with them, and though they tried to return the favor with the export of hockey, we all know which is the superior game.

It's not that Canada is a barren wasteland, but, it's kind of a barren wasteland. But all kidding aside. They have given the world some great things, like maple syrup, maple leaves, maple candy, Conan O'Brien and maple trees. Oh, and the Blue Jays. The Blue Jays were my dark horse of the East last year, and I think they've earned that credit again.

#23 - The Minnesota Twins

It's hard to believe that the cellar dwellers of the American League made it to #23, but they did. With only 63 wins and not a single 10 game winner on the pitching staff, the Twins were the doormat of the AL in 2011. So, what happened to the Twins team that Frankie and I thought had a chance at winning their division and quite possibly winning the AL Pennant? A lot. Injuries mostly. But the Twins have come out swinging in 2012, and with some retooling and a youth movement on the way, the Twins are ready to make some noise in the AL Central.

Like, really? Twins ahead of the Brewers? How did we let this happen. Did Frankie and I take crazy pills? Yes, we did. But maybe it was because yesterday was Leap Day, and nothing counts on Leap Day. But today is March 1st, and real life has to begin. Real life hit home in Minneapolis/St. Paul last year when their two best players only played a combined 151 games. So which Twins team will show up this year? A healthy one with promise, poise, and power, or the runt with compromised morals and a stupid ponytail?

#25 - The Seattle Mariners

As Frankie has once again fallen asleep at the wheel, you all get to read about the Seattle Mariners one day before you were supposed to. Think of it like a sneak peak of that movie you saw that preview for and weren't really interested but, hey, two free passes came your way and you have nothing else to do Tuesday night and could "The Vow" really be that bad? (It is.) Are the Mariners that bad? Well, no, nothing is that bad, and the Mariners are going to be quite competitive in 2012.

2011, like the previous year, was not kind to the Mariners. They finished second worst in the AL at 67-95, and finished dead last in the majors with a .233 average. They also finished last in on-base percentage and slugging percentage. Pitching was a little bit better. They finished 15th in the majors with a 3.90 ERA. Unfortunately, two of the big pieces of the rotation, Doug Fister and Miguel Pineda are now with the Tigers and Yankees, respectively. It's got to get better though, right? It's probably Jesus. And those piercing eyes...

#27 - The Houston Astros

The Houston Astros actually jumped two spots from last year's draft to #27. That's a pretty strong showing for a team that finished with only 56 wins last year. Last in the majors and a full seven games worse than the next team. So why did the Astros get a little bump? Because this is their last year in the NL Central, and their reloading team is going to use 2012 as a launch pad to the AL West, and I'm sure all you A's fans out there want to know what to look out for.

It's a good thing the Astros are getting out of the Central. Though they did win the NL Pennant in 2005, they've recently struggled to compete against the likes of the Cardinals, Brewers, Reds, and Cubs. However, AL West fans, this Astro team is not a doormat, and they're going to enter the wild west with guns blazing, wanting to prove themselves against what has become an elite division.

The roller coaster the Astros have been on over the last decade is pretty unbelievable. They went from best in the NL and a new ballpark to worst in the majors and a team for sale. Now that the new ownership is in place, this is a team with new direction, new hope, and a new desire to win.... and a new logo/mascot perhaps?



The Astros started last last season 0-5 and were never over .500 once the entire season. Sound familiar? It should. They started 2010 0-6, but unlike 2010, they were never able to right the ship. They had some good pieces that will be back this season, but really, 2012 will be a work in progress for the 'Stros.

#29 - The Kansas City Royals

Here it is! The MLB preview! And no, you didn't miss draft pick number 30, Frankie didn't write it yet. So here, a day ahead of schedule, are your favorite hapless franchise, the Kansas City Royals. I'll give you a hint. They're not going to win again this year. Kansas City is in full youth movement, and get ready to embrace those who might develop into stars on other teams in the next few years.

I'll remind you, like I did last year, that the Royals have not played October baseball since 1985, making them just a little bit harder to root for than the Pirates. Oh, who am I kidding, the Pirates are pretty miserable. They probably go hand in hand. Kansas Cityites and Pittsburghers should probably all join hands and sing of peace and harmony and of a world where they can be competitive. Maybe it will be the subject of Scorsese's next film. Where the star crossed cities, like Romemo and Juliet, must fight adversity and Jack Nicholson in order to join forces and make the playoffs.


Which one is Romeo?

Mannyball

He's here. And here's a quick word.

After hearing the words "Frank Thomas is an Oakland Athletic" and "Mike Piazza is an Oakland Athletic," you would think that I could hear everything and not bat an eye. But, this is one I never thought I would ever hear myself say. Manny Ramirez is an Oakland Athletic.

He has to sit out the first 50 games after a positive PED test. He's going to turn 40. He's not the guy who compiled 555 home runs and 1,831 runs batted in while batting .312 for the Indians and Red Sox. He's the guy who's going to have to compete for the DH job. At about $500,000 for the season, he was in the bargain bin.

I've never really liked Manny as a teammate, but look, the A's need all the home run threats they can get, and if Manny Ramirez wants to play baseball for your team and his work out went fine, you let him play baseball for your team. It's not like the A's have a clear cut DH anyway. Currently it's a battle between the likes of Seth Smith, Jonny Gomes, Colin Cowgill, and Chris Carter. So, why not give Manny a chance? Either way, I'm sure, come June, there will one more reason to watch the Oakland A's.

Céspedes: A New Hope

After a full off-season of moves to save payroll and gain prospects, the A's have done the unthinkable and signed Yoenis Céspedes. That's right, the Oakland Athletics spent money and won a sweepstakes on a highly coveted nationally targeted prospect. Quick, everyone check and make sure pigs aren't flying outside. This is not the kind of guy that the A's get. This guy usually goes to one of the big market teams, or one of the teams with a little extra money lying around. Most people thought Yoenis would be a Marlin, but maybe they ran out of money. Instead, the also rans, the Oakland A's have made what probably will be the last big free agent splash this offseason.



As I'm sure you're all well aware, Céspedes, 26, is projected as a five-tool centerfielder. In a perfect world, he has a fantastic spring and earns the starting centerfield job for the A's, bats third, and hits 28 HR and 100 RBI. In the Cuban league last year, he hit 33 HR (a Cuban league record) while hitting .333 and driving in 99 RBI. Those are fantastic numbers for a 90 game season, though it doesn't quite measure up to the majors in talent level. Either way, this signing makes me feel like this.

The Lull

Sports fans, we've come to what I call the season of the lull. It's that time post Superbowl... (Congratulations WITT for calling that correctly. If only more had listened to us our friends would be very rich.) But yes, it's that time between the Superbowl and March Madness where not much is happening in sports. Sure, the hockey season is beginning to heat up, but it's not quite to the playoff push. The NBA is post all-star break where people start paying attention, but it too lacks the fervor of the late season or semi-finals of the playoffs (when people start actually paying attention). Same thing with college basketball. Yeah, it's happening, but it's not yet tourney time.

I know many of your disagree with me. It's your late June, early July that the sports world seems barren. It's just that, here at WITT, we disagree. Sorry you indoor sport fans, sport is truly meant for the outdoors. Soccer played on other continents does not count.



The Lull is a time to reflect. It is a time to play Stratego. It really only lasts until about March first, when things start to get interesting in basketball and hockey. And the great news, is starting February 20th, we will once again present the world with our 30 team major league baseball preview. All the hardhitting action that kicked this blog off last year will be back with a vengeance. We'll once again present you with a what to expect from the MLB, as well as the best and worst case scenario from all the teams. You're gonna like what you read.



Oh yeah.... this article: 3 things I'm excited for in this, year two, of We're In This Thing.

Superbowl XLVI: Part I

Or, in which Frank and Eric debate the relative merits of teams they don't really care about but which the whole nation will watch.

Look, we all love the game. We want to see who will be the champion of the NFL. We just wish it wasn't the Pats and the Giants. It's not that they aren't great franchises from great cities. It's that they were just here. Both of them. There isn't much of a compelling point here unless you are really excited for a rematch. Or if you really enjoy the "which Manning is better" debate.

No one wanted this Superbowl outside of New York and New England. We saw this already. Merely four years ago in Superbowl XLII, a little known wide receiver named David Tyree made a catch that has immortalized him in football lore. It looked like this:



And guess what sports fans? The Giants are going to leave Indy with yet another Lombardi Trophy.

Manny Ramirez to the A's

Well here you go. The A's are going to make a splash with a clubhouse cancer who hasn't played since, what, April of last year? But imagine if we make the playoffs.... I'm starting to write the screenplay today.

Manny Coming to Oakland?

NFC Championship: Niners v. Giants

One year ago, two awkwardly close friends had a vision. A vision that they could create a blog filled with prose, poetry, laughter, and the occasional tear. A place where they could write their inane ramblings and force a few of their friends to read it from time to time when they felt guilty about it. But most of all, a journal where they could impart their knowledge and incoherent thoughts to an audience stretching worldwide. These two ruggedly handsome yet dignified gentlemen realized this dream, and they both hope you've enjoyed the ride over this first year.

It started with previews of the NFC and AFC Championship game and we'll kick off the second year with the same thing, first, yourrrrr San FranCISCOOOO FOOORRRRTYYYY-NNIIIINNNNNEEERRRRRRSSSSS.

Divisional Weekend

Last week wasn't so good. The experts here at We're In This Thing have a little egg on their faces, as their picks went 1-3 over wild card weekend. However, when at first you don't succeed, just remind Frankie that his Steelers lost to Tebow. I think that's how the idiom goes anyway. Either way, we'll have a good weekend of playoff football ahead of us, and though you may not want to take these picks to Vegas, here's what we see coming this weekend.



Note: If I turn up with black eyes somewhere, it is because Frankie has tracked me down. Do not call the authorities, we'll have sorted it out.

Wild Card Weekend

Seeing as Frankie took the time to post about tomorrow's Steelers-Broncos game, I figured I'd quickly give the other three games this weekend a little love and pick the outcomes. Five out of the last six Superbowls have featured a team who played on Wild Card Weekend, so is it possible one of these teams makes the Big Game? It's definitely a possibility, especially in the AFC. But the NFC could have a surprise in store as well. So, quickly, here's what I expect to see this weekend from the games not involving He Who Must Not Be Named.

Cincinnati 24, Houston 17

The Red Rifle Andy Dalton hooks up with AJ Green for a 80 yard bomb on the first play on offense. Cedric Benson then pounds two more in as TJ Yates and the Houston offense can't hold on to the ball long enough to give their defense a rest. Arian Foster's 130 yards on the ground aren't enough to keep the pressure off the passing game, and Houston laments what might have been had Matt Schaub stayed healthy. The Bengals take over late and head to the divisional round.

Detroit 41, New Orleans 38

In an instant classic, Drew Brees and Matthew Stafford put on a show that really ends in who has the ball last. Brees throws for four touchdowns and over 400 yards, but its just not enough to make up for the defense. Stafford grows up right before our eyes and leads a 1 minute drive to result in a pass to Megatron for the game winning touchdown. Who dat? Easy, it's the Motor City.

New York 24, Atlanta 13

The Giants' front seven shows up and pounds Matty Ice all day. Turner struggles to get going on the ground as well. Tony Gonzalez is able to catch yet another touchdown pass to further add to his hall of fame career, but the Giants and the Manning-Cruz connection pull away in the second half. Manning's two touchdowns and Bradshaw's lone score are the propellent for the Giants to the next round.

So there you have it from We're In This Thing: Steelers, Bengals, Lions, Giants. Take it to the bank.

8 Resolutions For Bay Area Sports This New Year

Now that we've all indulged heavily on delicious treats, both edible and inedible, it's time to rejoice in what we've seen over the past two weeks. It is definitely not time to focus on the moves your favorite baseball team may or may not have made, and it's definitely not time to focus on the egg that your favorite college football team may or may not have laid in San Diego. No, no, no.... instead, we'll focus on the positives. Though they may be few in number, there have been great things going on in the sports world over the last two weeks even if you're an East San Francisco Bay Area fan like I am. So, in case you've been stuffing your face with figgy pudding over the last two weeks, here's your friendly sports update.... of positives....



Even I feel bad for this poor guy

1. The NBA started... the Warriors have hope.
2. The Rose Bowl, Fiesta Bowl, and Outback Bowl made for a memorable day-after-New-Year's-Day.
3. The 49ers are in the playoffs.

So hey, we've got that going for us. But fear not, this year provides new hope for everyone, and here's a list of 8 resolutions our hometown teams and fans should make to help them succeed in the new year.